What men really think about love

Added: Andrianna Simek - Date: 12.01.2022 01:42 - Views: 44214 - Clicks: 3094

Ever wonder, 'Does he think about me as much as I think about him? Author and workshop leader Alison Armstrong provides expert advice to help women better understand how men think - and the secret to making relationships better as a result. Armstrong says very few women actually realize how different thinking is between men and women, yet desires remain the same.

The only way that I have discovered that men and women are alike is in our core desire. A desire to be loved, a desire to be accepted exactly the way that we are. And a desire to love, to love fully and to have one's love fully received and cherished. Men aren't as cut off from their feelings as many women might think, says Armstrong.

Actually, men's feelings are literally in a different place in their bodies. Women feel happy right in the middle of their chest, like a vibration of happiness. A man, when he feels happy, it's his upper chest and shoulders and neck that fill with energy. If you're watching him, he will literally puff up. He'll look bigger. If he has a moment of ecstasy and is really happy, it flows out through the chest and into his arms and hands, and that's where you get high-fives or jumping up to hit a cross-beam.

But when I ask men 'Where do you feel happiness? They actually pay more attention to women being happy than to themselves being happy! It's that simple. For a man, that he loves a woman is just one of many factors. One big thing he's going to consider is if she fits with the life that he envisions for himself, his goals.

Since he doesn't expect her to give up her life to blend into his, this can be very important. Men listen very carefully to women express themselves about what their dreams are and what they want, and they think, 'Could I give that to her? Do I want to give that to her? It's no mystery that women are generally more capable of multi-tasking than men. We almost never give anything our undivided attention," explains Armstrong. But men don't tend to be good multi-taskers. They pay attention to one result at a time.

They commit themselves to that one result and they're entirely focused on it, and they get very frustrated when they don't have what they need to do it. That can be hard for a woman to understand. It's the qualities they don't find in themselves or their friends. They're very much looking for nurturing , someone who cares for them and cares about them and pays attention in a way that women are uniquely made to pay attention.

Men derive an enormous amount of comfort from a woman's believing in them. If she thinks he can do it, he must be able to do it. It makes them braver. A man is also looking for a woman who will respond to his playfulness. Women tend to be much more serious. He's looking for her to be delighted. To be tickled. To let him make her laugh. Armstrong says men want a woman who will be behind him in good times and bad times. When a man commits to a person, he buys the whole package.

If someone criticizes his friend, he says 'That's just the way he is. Women don't generally have the same tendency to accept people for who they are, says Armstrong. We don't just say, 'That's the way he is. Because women tend to respond to criticism, we think criticizing a man will change him. But it just makes a man feel not accepted like he should keep his distance. It makes him feel he should be less giving and less involved. Armstrong stresses the importance of praising men when things are done right. And do it in a way that he'll respond to.

Men like to hear appreciation, but they're much more responsive to seeing it. In fact, things that have gone out of fashion, that feminism has put out of fashion, are really appreciated by men. If we're married and living together, anything that supports him in being a provider is going to make him feel appreciated. So if I make him lunch to take to work with him, that's appreciation. It's such a small thing for me, but it makes him feel great. According to Armstrong, the myth that successful women are intimidating or unattractive to men isn't true.

But it's not true. Men are attracted to and admire and desire successful women. What intimidates them is the attitude that comes with many successful women. And the attitude is, 'What do I need you for? Armstrong doesn't suggest acting weak in order to attract men.

The more we understand that men are distinct, the easier it is to admire them. There are ways that men think, ways that they approach things that women often don't have. It's ok to need men. There's no dishonor in that. We were made to be partners. Of course, while it's true that men and women generally think differently, it's important to not lump all men into one characterization. Every man is different, with different thoughts and feelings. If you're wondering what your male friend or partner is thinking - ask him! The Difference Between Men and Women Armstrong says very few women actually realize how different thinking is between men and women, yet desires remain the same.

The Stoic Man? Thinking About Love "One major difference is that women base more decisions on love," says Armstrong. The Multi-Tasking Differential It's no mystery that women are generally more capable of multi-tasking than men. What Men Want "Men look for different things in a romantic relationship than in their other relationships," says Armstrong.

Men Desire Loyalty Armstrong says men want a woman who will be behind him in good times and bad times. Women Try to Change Men Women don't generally have the same tendency to accept people for who they are, says Armstrong. Men and Criticism "Criticism ends more relationships than anything I can think of," says Armstrong. The Importance of Praise Armstrong stresses the importance of praising men when things are done right. Successful Women According to Armstrong, the myth that successful women are intimidating or unattractive to men isn't true.

The Male Distinction Armstrong doesn't suggest acting weak in order to attract men. Men as Individuals Of course, while it's true that men and women generally think differently, it's important to not lump all men into one characterization. The Secret Formula for Understanding Guys. By Crystal Schwanke. Secrets to Understanding Wine Rating Systems. By Erin De Santiago. By Michele Meleen.

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What men really think about love

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The Secret to Understanding How Men Think